It just hit me.

I was so worried about saving my AP biology grade, trying to understand difficult math, preparing to give a presentation about Taoism, maintaining my GPA, completing my publication for English class, keeping up with all of my extracurricular things, and staying up to date socially, that I didn't even realize how close summer is. It is within our grasp, and suddenly, I freaked out.

In a good way. :)

Sure, there are still a couple of difficult final exams ahead of me, yearbook duties and a lot of work, as well as summer obligations, but mostly... it's summer on my mind. My junior year- that one, epic year- is drawing to a close. My crucible, my challenge, my own series of hurdles: it was surviving this year. I did it, I guess, neither gracefully or totally honorably, but I DID IT. 

And, not to mention, I had more fun than I ever thought I would. There's a lot going on. Change is constant. I also just realized, with the ending of my junior year, how close college is. That in itself is way too much to think about. 

So, it all just hit me.

Summer.

I'm a little sad about summer's arrival, which I am faced with unexpectedly. I know, it's weird.

Everything you always wanted- a "good" reputation, academic success, a boy to love and be loved by, loyal friends, things to do, something to be proud of...

Everything I always wanted, and it is much easier said than done.

"Let's give 'em something to talk about."

I'm still feeling the stress, but it's being gradually reduced. I think I shall end with an excerpt from my journal, from an entry on October 21, 2008.

"When I woke up today, I had no idea how busy I would be.

But I'm optimistic.

Now I have everything to do...

Wish me luck?

(I'll let you know how it goes...)"

And I've kept that little promise completely. : ]